Sunday, April 20, 2008

Between a Rock and a Hard Place

The party's over.

In less than an hour I need to be at the train station to pick up Amanda who arrives home from New Jersey tonight. It's been one heck of a quick week and, even though I've missed her, I've rather enjoyed having time to myself and I think it's going to be take a little getting used to having someone else in the house again. I'm not so sure that I'd make a good hermit but I do rather like to have time alone so don't mind sharing company with just me, myself, and I from time to time. I hope that doesn't make me a bad mother!

Once I get back from the train station, I'm planning on making it an early night to bed as I stayed up way too late last night watching "Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason" simply because I have trouble turning off a movie with Colin Firth in it. Especially one with a happy ending as, incurable romantic that I am, I do love a happy ending. It was worth missing an hour or so of sleep to see Bridget and Mark resolve their problems! However, I now need to try to find that hour or so of missing sleep!

Speaking of resolving problems, I have a question to toss out to my readers that perhaps you can answer for me over the course of the next day or two. I will be working one of my long 16 -hour Monday shifts tomorrow so won't be getting back to the Blogosphere until probably sometime on Tuesday so there's plenty of time for people to weigh in with their thoughts and/or suggestions if they so choose. Here's my dilemma -

As regular readers know, I will be taking a mini-vacation of sorts to California in less than two weeks. I'll be going to the town where I used to live to see my best friend, my former grandmother-in-law, and to meet some new blogging buddies who live near the area all while eating copious amounts of Mexican food! I think it's going to be a wonderful time but there's one more thing that I'm just not sure whether I will get the chance to do or should do.

There is one other person I'd really like to see if at all possible but I'm just not sure if it is possible. This person is one of the ghosts from my past and I've not spoken to him in quite a long time though he is often in my heart and on my mind. Because I still care about him, and most certainly always will, I'd like to know how he's doing, whether life has been good to him, if he's happy, whether he accomplished any of the hopes and dreams he told me about the last time we spoke,and if by any chance he ever thinks about me at all. I don't want to intrude on his life but I really want to see him again. By the same token, I don't take rejection all that well and so am hesitant in getting in touch with him to see if he'd like to touch base while I'm all the way over on his side of the country. I fear being told that he would rather not have my face darken his visage ever again but I am also afraid that I may never get the chance to see him again if I don't do it while I'm there.

Between a rock and a hard place. That's where I am.

What do you think? Should I take the chance of being rejected or should I not take the risk and just come home knowing that I never had the courage to follow through with something that my heart really wants to do? What would you do if you were in my place? Would you be willing to take the risk?


  1. 1. That WAS a quick week!
    2. Colin Firth is in the new Mamma Mia! movie coming out this summer!
    3. Take that chance, girl!

  2. I'm like you, Linda, in that I like alone time for myself, not often, but sometimes. I think most of us feel that way.

    Now, about your question. Would I take the risk? Probably, although I'm no different from you in that I don't take rejection very well either. However, I read a saying once, and I can't remember the exact words but I'll try. It went something like this:

    If you are never willing to take a risk, then you won't ever succeed at anything as life itself is a risk.

    Hope this helps.

    Have a good week, and thanks for visiting me today.

  3. I say take a chance. Don't live with regret.

    Call or email and say you'll be in the area and would love to have lunch. Worst case, he makes excuses and you don't get together. Best case, you reconnect with an old friend.

    But that's what I would should do what you feel comfortable doing.

  4. travis made good sense but honestly if it was me i would not do it... but that's just me.

    have fun whatever you decide honey!

    smiles, bee

  5. Anonymous10:56 PM EDT

    Take a chance but make it easy on yourself. If you can find an email addy send him an email, or send a letter, something we're you're not having to hear his voice. So if he says no (stupid man!) then you can make up your own excuse in your mind. Kinda like filling in the blanks the way you want the story to end.

    If he says yes, you may have gained a friend or even better. Life is full of chances, fate, encounters, but you have to go along for the ride.

    If he says no to you there are so many reasons why, don't look at it as a rejection. Sorry for the long post, but I just feel so strongly about taking chances. We only have this lifetime to do that.

  6. Anonymous10:59 PM EDT

    Take a chance! You'll never know if you've missed out on an opportunity for finding a friend or even better. If he says no (stupid man!) there really may be some good reasons, but don't take his "no" as a rejection, please. You're so special!

  7. Anonymous12:05 AM EDT

    I say go for it...if you don't, you'll always wonder "what if"?!

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  9. Absolutely take the chance. You won't know unless you try.
    If it doesn't work out, Cyndi will help you get through it.

    Travis is right about not living with regret.

  10. I say take the risk too, Linda! Try to make the invite a bit low-key, just getting in touch, how've you been type stuff ya know -"lite" -you can do that, I know you can. And, as someone else said, if he can't make it, don't take it as an out-and-out rejection but rather as someone who may have wanted to see you but just couldn't work it into his schedule at this time. Maybe you can strike up an e-mail communication though later to just keep abreast of things in each others lives. Who knows? Possibilities are limitless and if you don't make the first move, think of what you may have missed altogether then. So, just DO IT!

  11. Go for it!! The first thing you'll say to yourself when you get back is that you wish you would have got in touch with him!

    The odds are if you had a connection with him he is wondering about you as well!! I recently had someone from my past call me and I was very surprised.

  12. You have to contact him. He can say yes or no but until you ask you'll never know. Life is not a rehearsal honey, grasp it with both hands and wring it dry - do it or you'll regret it. I have a feeling it will be the best thing you've done in a long time. xx

  13. Linda, you absolutely have to go see him! You would regret it later. And why would he say know - you are such a wonderful gal? :o)))

  14. Can't wait to see you and have Mexican food. I wouldn't suggest anything but.

    I say go for it. You will always wonder if you don't. What the heck. See you soon. :)

  15. I am of the same mind as the other respondents, you should take that chance. No need to ask 'what if?'

  16. I feel like non hugging a non hugger :)

  17. You must. You must. You must.

    You have a million safety nets in case of panic.

  18. Absolutely make contact. You could take the coward's way out and send him a note saying that you will be coming back to town and would love to get together for coffee. Include your cell phone number.

    Remember, he only has as much power as you give him. There is never anything wrong with loving another human being as long as you don't weight them down with the obligation to return it. Just enjoy the feeling for yourself and if something comes back, that's wonderful.

  19. Anonymous1:28 PM EDT

    I think majority should rule on this... TAKE THE CHANCE!!!


  20. Anonymous6:36 PM EDT

    Looks like you've got plenty of input, so I'll just say "Good luck!" As long as you understand it can go either way, there's no reason not to let him know you're going to be in the area.

  21. Go for it! Absolutely, positively do it, otherwise, you'll always wonder what you missed. Good luck.

    Sandy B

  22. well, about your question. I'd say sit and really learn your intentions first. If your intention is to A) put "closure" (I hate that word) a nice ending to what was and will never be then go for it, but if your intention is B) to see if you can say hi, all the while hoping he'll kiss you and give you 10 ways to contact him at any moment of the day then no. I wouldn't suggest going. Please forgive my bluntness hon, but He's A Cop, if he wanted your number he could have found it by now. Sorry. (I hate being the bad guy)

    I do love you, really I do.

  23. Go for the gusto! Just remember, if he says no, it's HIS problem and has nothing to do with you. I'm like you - rejection and the fear thereof, has kept me from a lot of things. When you reach a "certain age," (GAG!) it's time to feel brave and don't spend countless hours worrying about what someone else thinks. We all know you're a Numero Uno in our book!!!


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