Did Anyone Get the License Plate ...

...  of the the truck that hit me?  Whoa.  I cannot for the life of me seem to get going this morning.  I can't remember how many times I woke up just enough to tell myself "It's time you got out of bed" before rolling over and falling right back asleep but I can assure it was definitely more than one or two.  I finally managed to swing my legs over the side of the bed and force myself into an upright position at 10:36 but even after shuffling off to the Keurig machine and brewing up a nice hot cup of coffee, I'm still doing a zombie impression that would make Amanda proud!

I'm going to blame it on the recent change to Daylight Savings Time as no matter what my clock might say, physically I still know that it's an hour earlier than that. With a 16-hour shift ahead of me on Sunday, I set my clocks ahead to 10:00 and went to bed to do some reading early for me on Saturday night figuring I'd be able to adjust to the lost hour by going to sleep a bit earlier than I usually do but when I got up at 5:30 Sunday morning of course the very first thing I thought was "But it's really 4:30!" so there was no fooling myself into thinking that hour hadn't disappeared.  All day I felt more tired than usual and today - well - let me just say it was a good thing I had the opportunity to sleep in as I obviously needed it!

I've yet to figure out why we as a nation even do Daylight Savings Time anymore. The old reasons of the farmers needing more light is rather defunct and as far as it saving energy, I'd be interested to see if in fact it did.  More than anything I think it produces a nation of zombies for a week or so afterward while everyone tries to get their internal clocks to adjust and their sleep schedules back on schedule.  Not that I have the greatest sleep schedule in the world, mind you, but if I lived in either Arizona or Hawaii I wouldn't have to mess with it at all as they don't participate in the falling back and springing forward that the rest of us do.  Maybe they're on to something?

And on a final totally unrelated note, I wanted to say a big THANK YOU to those who have been voting in the My Connecticut Story contest that I'm participating in.  Through your help my story has made its way to the number one spot - woohoo!  The trick now is going to be keeping it there so if you're registered already, don't forget you can vote once each 24-hour period up until the contest ends on May 25th - which is a darned long way out and an awfully long time to run a contest.  Anyhow, if you've not voted yet but want to it's a bit of a process to register but once you have, you simply have to log in each time you return to vote again.  Click on the link above if you'd like to help a blogger out!

Meanwhile, I'm going to shuffle off to get another cup of coffee or two ...

Five on Friday - The Time Version

With Daylight Savings Time beginning this weekend I thought it might be appropriate to do a Five on Friday set of songs with the theme "time" interwoven throughout them. Fortunately lots of folks like to sing about "time" so finding five wasn't hard at all but picking just five was!  Hopefully there's something in this mix that you'll take the time to enjoy and don't forget that if you'd like to join us for Five on Friday some week, pop on over to Trav's Thoughts and follow the very simple rules - it won't take any time at all!

Vote For Me! Vote For Me!

I seem to be all about contests lately as I find myself entering yet another one and then stumping for votes - gee, this must be an election year, huh?  The latest one that I'm shooting for is sponsored by Visit Connecticut which is the official website for the Connecticut Commission on Culture & Tourism.

History and travel nut that I am, I signed up to be an official Connecticut Ambassador last fall and I've been trying to plan out some journeys here in my home state to write up in The Distracted Wanderer as it doesn't seem quite fair that I spend all of my time out of state.  Granted our Salem here is nothing like my favorite Salem in Massachusetts but that doesn't mean that there isn't still interesting places to wander to - I just have to find them and the tourism website should be a big help in that respect.

Anyhow, they are currently sponsoring a contest called "What's Your Connecticut Story" asking readers to "Tell us where your passion lies. We want to hear about the Connecticut people, places, and experiences you love most." When I first heard about it I was a bit lost as to what story I might be able to tell until I had an email from my cousin Amy yesterday. I had sent her a link from the tourism website entitled "How to See Connecticut in Five Days" and she sent me back a reply saying:

"I didn't see the part in there that says, "For added amusement at Lake Compounce, talk your wimpy cousin into sitting in the back car of the "White Knuckler" wooden roller coaster that your long-dead grandfather rode in as a child." 

Ah-ha! A memory and a story for the contest was born!

Taking a Ride With Gramp

With many thanks to cousin Amy for not only the inspiration but also for taking the ride with me, my submission for the contest can be found at the link under the picture above. If you could possibly see your way through the registration/log-in process to cast a vote my way, I would greatly appreciate it and I'm sure Amy would also as I've promised to share any sort of a win with her should there be one which seems only fair as after all, I talked her into the ride to begin with!

Okay ... So ... Let's Try This Again!

Just about this time last year - one year ago today to be exact - this was the view I was taking in from the bow of the ship as the Carnival Glory set out from Grand Turk and we began our voyage back to Miami with just one sea-day left on my very first cruise to the Eastern Caribbean.  

A little earlier in the day the view had looked like the one above as the ship was docked and passengers were taking advantage of the beach in Grand Turk regardless of the clouds in the sky and the rain that was occasionally falling.

I figured that was going to be one of the last pictures that I ever took of the Carnival Glory as it sat in port somewhere as truth be told, I really wasn't too enamored of the whole cruising thing - or at least that's pretty much what I had told myself throughout most of our cruise.  Heck, if you asked any of the other folks that I was cruising with, they'd probably tell you that I downright hated it but that wasn't exactly the case as there were a lot of things I liked about cruising along with a lot of things I didn't.  

Having had the chance to mull it over for the past year and look at the whole thing objectively, I decided that there was probably a lot more that I did like than I didn't like so when Barb, my cabin mate from last year, broached the subject of giving cruising another shot with a 7-day Boston to Canada itinerary it didn't take me long to say "sure, let's go!"  

That's Barb in the picture above while we were in port in San Juan, Puerto Rico and she sure looks like she was having a great time, doesn't she?  Simply put that's because she was and she did for the entire cruise as she's the type of person who knows how to go and have a good time and enjoy herself.  A transplanted New Englander who has obviously learned how to relax since moving to the South, I could take a few lessons from Barb in making the most of a vacation and putting some yay in my day!

No doubt there have been those who have scratched their heads and wondered why on earth Barb would even consider going on another cruise with me when I didn't particularly like the last one which is fair enough but allow me just to say that Barb knew the parts of the cruise that bothered me and the parts of the cruise that I liked and she understood why I was feeling the way I was.  Because of that - and because she really, really wants to go on another cruise! - Barb is willing to take another chance on me and hasn't written me off as a complete and total loss in spite of my past performance!

As it turns out, the cruise that we'll be taking out of Boston on June 3rd just so happens to be on the exact same ship that we were on last year at this time which strikes me as either very ironic or very fortuitous. Yep, I'll be cruising on the Carnival Glory again and giving her a chance to show me what I missed the last time and change my mind about that whole "I'm not so sure about cruising" thing.  Even though it might have been nice to try a different ship, I consider this to be a bit of a plus as I already know my way around the ship and I also know exactly where my favorite spot can be found.

Hello Deck Three - I've missed you!

So during my next cruise I'll be avoiding as much as I can of this ... 

... and enjoying more of this ... 

... while I'll also be doing a lot more of this ... 

... as we sail from Boston to Portland and then on to Saint John and Halifax. There may not be tropical beaches but there will be lots of lighthouses, the bay with the highest tides in the world, and a friend who hasn't given up on me! Sounds just about perfect I think! 

For those who wish to start placing bets that I'm not going to like this cruise any better than I did my last trip on the Glory, feel free to wager away but be prepared to lose as I have already promised Barb that I have every intention of enjoying every minute that I can and that's a promise that I aim to keep - honest! 

Your Invitation to Check-in For a Virtual Visit of The Ahwahnee in Yosemite National Park

I might not ever be able to afford to stay there but I was able to afford lunch and a drink at Yosemite's beautiful and historic The Ahwahnee during my last trip to California. If you'd like to check it out, it won't cost you a thing to take a virtual tour of the National Park Service's premiere example of "rustic architecture" if you click over to The Distracted Wanderer  and read my latest post:

 The Ahwahnee - Yosemite National Park's Historic Hotel & The National Park Service's Premiere Example of "Parkitecture"

Five on Friday - The March Version

For this first Friday in March's version of Five on Friday - a musical meme hosted by Travis of Trav's Thoughts - I decided to pick five of my favorite marches by the legendary composer and conductor known as the American March King.

Beginning in 1917 until his death in 1932, John Philip Sousa wrote 136 marches so picking just five was kinda tricky - especially considering I've always quite loved march music.  There's just something about watching a marching band in a parade playing a fine bit of music as they go by that puts a lump in my throat and a tear in my eye every single time; that's either a result of my military upbringing or the fact that I'm a total sap!

Anyhow, I started out this week's set with a video that I took back in June of 2008 when Amanda was still attending Norwich Free Academy and played in the band there.  I never could talk her into joining the marching band but she was in concert band for two years and I proudly and happily attended all of her concerts including this one where they performed Sousa's "El Capitan".   If you look closely, you can just make out her blue hair in the second row among the other flutists.  And yea, I know that her band director is glowing in the video but Mr. Mac wore a bright white jacket and the lights reflecting on it made him even brighter! Not that I had the greatest video camera in the world either but ah well at least I had one!

As for the other marches I've included, they're among my other Sousa favorites, especially "King Cotton" which always reminds me of riding on a carousel and "The Liberty Bell" which reminds me of watching "Monty Python" on PBS when I was in high school.  "The Washington Post" was written in 1889 for the awards ceremony for the newspaper's essay contest and is considered one of Sousa's most popular marches and certainly no set of favorite Sousa marches could be complete without "Stars and Stripes Forever" - at least not my set of marches! After all, it is the National March of the United States!


Even though it's not a Sousa march, as an added bonus I just have to include "Seventy-Six Trombones" which is the signature song from The Music Man  by Meredith Wilson. A lot of people think this is another Sousa march as it sure sounds like one of his but that's simply because Wilson was a member of Sousa's band as a flute and piccolo player from 1921 to 1923.  Personally I think it's a pretty nice tribute from one composer to another!

Something to More Than Look Forward To!

May I just say that March has started out on an absolutely fabulous note?  I hadn't written anything about it earlier as I didn't want to jinx myself but around mid-February I entered into a vacation giveaway contest being held by the innkeepers at Sunset Hill House - a historic inn with a great back-story that traces its history to the Grand Resort Hotels that I love so much. Located in the town of Sugar Hill smack in the middle of the White Mountains of New Hampshire and within site of the Green Mountains of Vermont, the circa 1880 former servants' housing for the Sunset Hill House Grand Hotel is owned by two former Army officers who purchased the property in March of 2000 and have turned it into one of the finest country inns in New England.

The contest was offering ten lucky winners the chance to spend a 5-night vacation at Sunset Hill House as an "embedded Facebooker" with the only stipulation being that "winners must agree to investigate all aspects of the inn during their stay, and post what they find on the inn’s Facebook page every day." Well, if that didn't sound like it was right up my distracted wandering alley, what did?

To enter, those interested needed to apply by email "outlining why they are qualified to be an embedded Facebooker, why they want to visit Sunset Hill House and the White Mountains, what dates they are and are not available throughout 2012 and any other reasons they should be chosen." As I mulled over what to write that didn't sound too much like flat-out begging, the thought occurred to me that a 5-night vacation at Sunset Hill House would be absolutely perfect for when my friend Claire would be visiting from England later this fall. I had promised Claire a trip up to the White Mountains while she was here and what better way to do that than to be one of the contest winners?

With that in mind I finally wrote Lon and Nancy an email though I have to admit to having a bit of a problem with brevity as you guys know that I tend to run off at the keyboard from time to time to time!  It was my hope that my prolific use of words would be seen as enthusiasm rather than lack of control so after sending off the email I crossed my fingers and pestered the staff at Sunset Hill House as much as possible on their Facebook page without trying to be too obnoxious! Claire chimed in also and between the two of us I think we sent up more hopes and wishes to win than the universe wanted to hear!

The winners were announced earlier today on Facebook and am very, very, very happy to report that I was chosen as one of the ten winners of the contest!  Did I mention that I was happy to report that??  Oh yes indeed I am and I can't wait to find out what week we'll be going!  I've got no doubt in my mind that I was chosen because of my traveling companion as between the two of us, I'm sure that Claire and I will make the best "embedded Facebookers" that the inn could have picked and they won't be at all disappointed with our social networking abilities being that we are both quite versed in blogging, Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Pinterest, LinkedIn, and the like.

I tell ya, this is a wanna-be travel writer's dream come true right here and I am going to be putting my Nikon through its paces and then some during that wonderful week in the White Mountains!  I promise to share all of the fun, fantastic food, and fine accommodations both here and at The Distracted Wanderer as well as on Facebook so not to worry, if you aren't a Facebooker you won't miss out.

Gee, do you think it's too soon to start packing?!?

Sunset Hill House in Sugar Hill, New Hampshire:  Image credit

A Tale of Exceptional Customer Service

Sometime back in early 2010 - don't ask me exactly when because I'm terrible with dates these days! - I bought a fancy-dancy Keurig coffee brewer after having had the chance to try one at work being that we have one in the Dispatch Center which gets extensive use.  I figured it would be the perfect thing to have at home being that when Amanda or I would brew a pot of coffee most of it got tossed as neither one of us seemed to finish the pot and with a Keurig you get one fresh-brewed cup at a time.  I'll admit the brewer wasn't inexpensive but once we got it we loved it - as apparently did Tesla as next to it is often his favorite place to perch!

Fast forward to the past few weeks or so when my fancy-dancy Keurig machine started having some issues.  Most of the time it was taking forever to brew a cup of coffee which could only be accomplished following a lot of finagling and coaxing.  I decided it was probably due for a good cleaning so last weekend I bought some white vinegar, followed the instructions for descaling the brewer, and last Sunday it worked like a champ again.  Yay!

Unfortunately that 'yay!' didn't last for long as when I attempted to brew a cuppa joe this past Wednesday it just wasn't happening.  I'd get the indicator telling me that it was "brewing" but no water was coming through the K-cup and no matter what I did to cajole it, it just wasn't happening.  Caffeine-deprived and cranky I posted the following status update on Facebook:

It appears that my beloved Keurig Machine has officially bit the dust in spite of my repeated efforts to resuscitate it. I find this to be most distressing. Most distressing indeed.

Several friends responded that I should contact the folks who manufacture the Keurig machines as they themselves had either had problems with one or knew someone who had problems with one and after contacting Keurig, they were sent replacement machines. Knowing that mine was out of warranty by close to a year I wasn't positive that I'd be so lucky but I figured it couldn't hurt to try so I picked up the phone and called the contact number for Customer Service listed on their website.

Within moments I was talking to a very nice gentleman who told me to gather up a flashlight, a measuring cup, and a paperclip so that we could try some troubleshooting techniques.  Alas, upon completion of following his instructions my beloved machine still wasn't working but the nice gentleman with the soft Southern twang on the phone said not to worry, that they'd send me out a brand spanking new machine free of charge including the shipping and handling.  All I needed to do on my end was to return the K-cup holder to the company.  Really?  Even out of warranty?  Cool coffee beans!

All of that transpired late Wednesday evening and early Friday morning look what arrived on my doorstep via FedEx -

Tada! Behold my new Keurig machine!

I must say that I am most impressed with Keurig's Customer Service and with their willingness to replace a brewer that was out of warranty but had obviously broken down to the point of no return.  I find a company who stands behind their product to be a rare exception these days and I can't say enough good things about Keurig at this point - you people rock and roll and am most grateful for my new machine which brews a mighty fine cup of coffee - mighty fine indeed!

Speaking of which, I'm going to go brew another one now!

Five on Friday - The February 2003 Version

Nine years ago today my father lost his battle with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma but rather than dwell on that sad day, I thought I'd simply use February 2003 as a jumping-off point for this week's Five on Friday  meme presented and hosted by our man with the most over on the West Coast - Travis. Granted, I'm pretty sure there are only two songs in this batch that my Dad would have ever listened to but two is better than none and I book-ended the five with the ones he would have listened to.

So what events transpired in February - a month that is not high on my list of favorites - to inspire my musical choices?


February 3 – Police respond to a 911 phone call from one of Phil Spector's neighbors and discover the body of actress Lana Clarkson, with a gunshot wound, at Spector's his home in Alhambra, California. Spector is arrested on suspicion of murder." Written by Barry Mann, Phil Spector and Cynthia Weil, "You've Lost That Loving Feeling" is one of the foremost examples of Spector's "Wall of Sound" technique - a music production technique for pop and rock music recordings.


February 8 – Avril Lavigne scores her third #1 single "I'm with You", making her the second artist in history to have three consecutive #1 songs from a début album in the Billboard Mainstream Top 40.


February 20 – Fire engulfs a Rhode Island nightclub during a fireworks display which was part of the performance by rock band Great White. The fire quickly spread across the ceiling, filling the building with thick, black smoke, killing 100 people and injuring 160 others as audience members rush for the exits. Many people are missing for some time, including Great White guitarist Ty Longley, who is later confirmed to be dead.



February 23: "Don't Know Why" by Norah Jones went on to win three Grammy Awards in 2003 for "Record of the Year", "Song of the Year", and "Best Female Pop Vocal Performance". It remains Jones's biggest hit single in the USA to date, and her only one to reach the Top 40 on the Billboard Hot 100.



February 23: The Grammy Award for Best Male Country Vocal Performance was awarded to Johnny Cash for "Give My Love to Rose", a song Cash had originally recorded in the late 1950s.



Continue to rest in peace, Dad, and look out for the new additions that have joined you in heaven lately; they might need some help getting settled.

Where There is Sadness ... Joy

So ... it's been a week since my best friend of 25+ years departed this earthly life (though in my heart I know that she left us on February 14th when she went into cardiac arrest and not on the 16th when her family had to make the very painful decision to shut off life support) and my emotions have naturally been yo-yo'ing all week.  Up. Down.  Around the corner.  Around the world.

Sometimes I look at the cardiac arrest as a blessing that Cyndi didn't have to go through the worst that ALS was going to throw at her.  Sometimes I look at the cardiac arrest as a stinking thief that robbed me of time that I still had with my friend.  And sometimes, well, sometimes I just stop trying to reason things out and just cry.

It hasn't all been tears though, there have been a lot of smiles and joyful memories.  My cousin Amy - ever the organized librarian - searched through some of her photos and found a few from a trip that we took out to California back in 1997 (one of the few times I was able to talk her into getting on a plane and flying west with me). After flying into San Francisco, Amy stayed to visit with her friend Vanessa while I continued on to Stockton to visit with Cyndi but the four of us got together to take a trip up to Lake Tahoe while we were there and thank goodness someone thought to take some pictures. Believe it or not, I didn't have a camera in my hands all the time back then!

See?  My hands are empty!  The pictures are copies of copies so the quality isn't the best in the world but that's okay, they're pictures of Cyndi and we were in our favorite place together and that's all that matters.

I've also spent some time searching through this blog and finding posts that were about Cyndi and I'm happy that there are several to be found as reading them brings her back to life for me even for just a little while.  I'm not going to drag all of them out but there were two that stood out for two very different reasons.  The first was written on October 26th, 2006 and not only was the post about Cyndi but she actually left several comments on it which was highly unusual!

"We do not remember days; we remember moments." ~ Cesare Pavese

The second post is even more special simply because of the response that it received.  I wrote it on August 13th, 2007 when Cyndi was going through a really hard time with putting her autistic youngest son into a specialized home. I wrote the post to ask folks to go by Cyndi's blog and leave her a message of support and encouragement and I have to say, the response was happily overwhelming as thirty people went over and left her a comment.

The Things We Do For Love ...

I had always told Cyndi that people in the Blogosphere were the best and they sure didn't let me down.  Re-reading those comments brought both a smile to my face and a tear to my eye as even though I've lost touch with some of them, thirty people took the time to go say a word of concern to my friend - to a woman they had never met and never would. That spoke volumes as it just went to show that Cyndi was so special that others were willing to take a few moments for her - something I always knew but something that others apparently thought also.

Truthfully I was afraid that somewhere along the lines Cyndi might have deleted her blog or made it private as she never was ever really able to get into blogging for one reason or another but thankfully it's still there and I hope that it always will be as it gives me a little piece of her.  Had I ever been able to talk her into actually blogging it would have given me a bigger piece of her but heck, I'll take what I can get!

Speaking of getting things, I had my once-a-month lunch with my friend Rhonda yesterday and being the kind-hearted soul that she is, she gave me a bouquet of flowers in remembrance of Cyndi.  I'm blessed to have a friend like Rhonda just as I was blessed to have a friend like Cyndi and am blessed with the friends I have made through this thing we all like to call the Blogosphere.

Thank you all for the support and encouragement that you have given to me during this difficult time, it honestly has meant the world to me. There truly can be joy - and beauty - in the midst of sadness.

Reflections on a Dirty Windshield

The view from the driver's seat on the drive home from Salem last Friday.

That's all I've got for today.

Sometimes All That Wandering Can Be a Sweet Thing

Last week I had occasion to make a trip back up to Salem, Massachusetts (where most of you seem to think I should just go ahead and move to but then where would my "Go To" place be??) and while I was there I had the chance to make a visit to Ye Olde Pepper Companie - an unassuming little building on Derby Street directly across from the House of the Seven Gables.

It might not look like much from the outside but once you pass through that door you become like a kid in a candy shoppe because that's exactly what it is run by America's oldest candy company as a matter of fact!  I'm not going to tempt you with all of the chocolaty and sugary goodness to be found at Ye Olde Pepper Companie in this post but if you'd like to pop over to The Distracted Wanderer I certainly will as I show you around inside and introduce you to America's oldest produced candy - the Salem Gibralter.

So what are you waiting for?  You're not going to gain any weight just looking! Honest!

"I Always Thought I'd See You Again" ~ James Taylor

I went to bed last night feeling somewhat sad with this song winding its way through my head as even though I went to California believing that it was going to be my last trip there, after visiting with Cyndi and seeing the improvements that she had made in being able to speak again and her positive attitude of getting better and getting home even with the ventilator in tow, I thought there might actually be time to see her again before the ALS got even worse. When I left I told her that I would be back if I could and heck, I even went ahead and bought another plane ticket for April as the price was too good to pass up and I thought for sure she'd still be around then.

The universe apparently had other plans though and never being very good at gambling, buying that plane ticket was one that I took and lost and I'm now in possession of a ticket that I really don't want to use as going back to California this soon would probably be a bit too painful.  So, I'll hang on to it and try to find something to do with it during the next year before the credit expires but if I don't, well, that's okay I guess and I'll just chalk it up to the faith that I had that Cyndi would still be there.

After all, you've got to have faith, right?

Reaching Back to 2006 and a Guest Post

Once upon a time, when this blog was still fairly young, my friend Cyndi wrote a guest post for me; for those of you who weren't around back then I thought I'd share it and by doing so, share some of my friend with you. I think that in reading this, you'll be able to get a glimpse into why it was that I loved her so and always will.  I just wish I had been successful in convincing her to write her own blog but she thought she was too wordy ... ha! Like that ever stopped me!

Thursday, September 26th, 2006

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity." ~ Albert Einstein

I'm annoyed by people who mangle the quotations of others in an effort to communicate their own ideas.

With the mea culpa tidily handled, I say: It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our sanity--or at least MY sanity.

O.K., you got me. Linda would never resort to such a cheesy lead-in. I confess, I am a guest; guest blogger, that is. I'm Cyndi, Linda's friend, alter-ego, former dispatch partner and part-time conscience, in no particular order. Linda is taking a well-deserved day off. She has kindly allowed me to achieve my 15 seconds of fame via today's post, and for good reason. It is, after all, my sanity that is challenged, but for a change it was not one of my own three kids who sent me plunging down the abyss.

Nope; this time it was Linda's dear Amanda who gave me the hearty shove.

Mind you, most of the time I adore Amanda. She's a great kid. We share certain traits; sensitivity, a love of various arts, a flair for multitasking, and California birth certificates (I had to throw that last bit in just for Amanda. Yo Cali-girl!).

Yep, Amanda's a great kid who somehow felt it perfectly reasonable to tap into my conversation with her mother this afternoon to let us both know that she absolutely had to have the telephone line cleared right away because she had to make a call of her own.

So far, no big deal, right? Sure, Linda and I live some 3,000 miles apart and converse only a couple of times a month, but we were barely in the midst of invoking world peace or ending the threat of global warming when said interruption occurred. Granted, my 14th birthday passed sometime around the time Cleopatra was batting her lashes at Marc Anthony; still, I can vaguely summon that feeling of urgency that drives adolescent talk fests. Finally, it hasn't been all that long ago that my own daughter passed through the age in which a five minute delay in making a phone call feels more like five years of agony.

Given all of this, I thought Linda's response was quite generous, mom-wise: She offered Amanda use of her cell phone to place her call. And Amanda said ... no. Nope. No thanks; only the landline phone would do, because she needed to place a three-way call, and apparently this was not possible on Linda's cell phone.

What I said at this point is ... well ... probably best not repeated here.

Mind you, Ms. Amanda already had possession of the family computer at this point, yet she wanted the PHONE too? For a conference call?

I hereby nominate Linda for Mother of the Year for ever so calmly suggesting that we hang up so she could call me back on her cell phone. Problem solved; so why does the whole thing still stick in my craw hours later?

Answering machines, Call Waiting, conference calls, email, IM's, blogs, Cell phone, texting, Blackberry/PDA, Pager (yup, some of us still carry those along with the rest of the stuff). My purse runneth over, but I don't feel any more in touch than I did before most of this stuff was available.

So I ask you, gentle readers: Am I the only one who thinks that the whole communication thing is getting out of hand? What would Einstein do?

Personally, I'm in favor of leaving the electronic gear in the hands of the teens (or the cats) and heading for a secluded beach; margarita in one hand and a good book in the other.

See y'all there!

Note from Linda: Thank you, Cyndi! I appreciate you filling in for me as I never would have gotten to the computer before 10:00 p.m. last night as Amanda had it tied up so she could work on her Naruto AMV while IM'ing her friends and still making that three-way call of hers. At least she has inherited my outstanding multi-tasking abilities! Oh, and thanks for the nomination for Mother of the Year though we both know I'd have a snowball's chance in a very warm place of actually winning it - were there such a thing!

A Final Song for Cyndi

Last night at 8:22 p.m. I received a text message from Angela:

"Linda, we will be disconnecting mom's life support tonight. The doctor was very clear that she would not awaken. We think it's what mom would want. I would call but it's just too difficult."

I told her that I understood completely and to give her mom a kiss goodbye for me and tell her that I love her. Angela texted back and said that she would.

I'm still trying to process the fact that Cyndi's gone; that it was just one week ago that I was talking to her and laughing with her; that I was buying her "walnuts with seatbelts" from See's Chocolates and picking out a "Grandma duster" for her to wear instead of a hospital gown. When I left her to head back to Connecticut she was happily getting ready to have a shower and put on her new mint green robe with snaps down the front so that she could put it on easily in spite of the ventilator tube in her throat. After giving her a hug, I walked towards the door to leave and the very last thing she said to me was "I love you"; thank God I had the chance to tell her that I loved her too.

I keep waiting for her to tap me on the shoulder and tell me that "it just ain't right" or to suck it up and stop crying but that hasn't happened yet. Maybe she's too busy going through the initiation process in heaven and will get to me later ... I can only hope. And hope I will.

Rest in peace my dear, dear friend and know that you meant the world to me; I shall never ever forget you and will carry your memory in my heart forever. You were the best.

An Update and a Prayer Request

As I sit here looking out the window of my room on the sixth floor of the Hawthorne Hotel in Salem and try to digest the news that I just got from California, I can only think that at least I'm in a place that makes me happy as I feel sadder than I have felt in a very, very long time.

A little bit ago I spoke to Cyndi's daughter Angela and received the news that Cyndi has been in a coma for the past two days and the family now has to make the painful decision as to whether or not to turn off the ventilator that has been breathing for her for the past month or hold out hope that maybe - just maybe - her brain will come back to life.

Apparently Cyndi went into cardiac arrest this past Tuesday night following what they think may have been a blockage of some sort in her lungs.  It's not known exactly how long she was without oxygen but after being given CPR for 5-6 minutes they were able to get her heart started again.  However, due to the lack of oxygen, it appears that she has suffered a lot of brain damage and has not had any noticeable brain activity since they revived her.  Angela said that the doctors told her that generally speaking, the first 48 hours following such an event are pretty much the determining factor as to whether or not she'll regain any brain activity and - as much as I hate to say it - it doesn't look like there has been any nor will there be any.

Cyndi was pretty emphatic about wanting to stay alive as long as her mind was functioning - one of the few things that ALS doesn't touch so she was quite cognizant of the fact that the rest of her body was giving out on her - but she also was quite adamant about not wanting to be kept alive if her mind was gone. Angela said that they had talked about it quite extensively (and Cyndi being Cyndi, I've got no doubt she covered all of her bases when it came to that sort of thing) so she knows what her Mom would want done if she is, as feared, brain-dead.  She would want them to shut off the ventilator and let her go releasing her from the prison that her body has become.

As I look at the church steeple in front of me, I am reminded that Cyndi always had a lot of faith and firmly believed that there's more to it than just the life that we live here on earth so I've got no doubt that she would want to "get to it" and begin the adventure that awaits her on the other side. She wouldn't want to be hooked up to machines that kept her alive when her brain was gone and she could no longer think for herself and she wouldn't want to be a burden to those who loved her either.

That said, I wasn't quite ready to say a final good-bye yet and even though I knew this was coming, I didn't think it was coming this fast.  Angela said that she'll keep me posted as to what decision the family makes but at this point, I'm afraid it's probably all over except for the legalities.

Except for the final pronouncement by a doctor with time of death, my friend is gone and my heart is broken though I am very, very thankful that I got out to see her when I did.  I know that all things happen for a reason, I've believed that for as long as I can remember, and I know that people oftentimes don't get the chance to say good-bye or explain to someone how much they've meant to them in their lives so I should count myself lucky that I did have that chance and that I did have a friend like Cyndi in my life but I've got to tell you, right now I'm not feeling very lucky at all.  Except maybe for the fact that I'm in Salem and I can cry in peace as I mourn the loss of a part of me.

If you're the type that offers up prayers, I would appreciate a few for Jeff, Cyndi's husband, and her children Angela and Ronnie as they make the tough decisions out there in California.  I'm sure they'd appreciate it, too.

Trying Not to Be Sad But Failing Somewhat Miserably

I've been looking at the computer screen for awhile now trying to think of how to write about the main reason that I flew 3,000 miles out to California last week during a month when the weather is about as unpredictable as it comes and have finally decided that I'm not quite sure how to write about my friend of 25 years who is quite obviously dying but doing it in her own inimitable style. I'm going to try though as writing is cathartic and I could use some of that right now.

I knew that going out to Stockton to see Cyndi was going to be tough but I also knew that it was something that I was not willing to not do.  There was just no way that I was not going to take the opportunity to visit the person who probably knows me best in this life, the person I could always turn to no matter what, the person who always knew what to say and how best to say it, and the person who loved and supported me during some of the stupidest - and hardest - moments of my life.  "Tough" be damned, this visit was important - for both of us.

"Tough" might not be the best way to describe it, though. "Heart-rending" might actually be a better description as that's exactly what it is when you walk into a hospital room in the Respiratory Intensive Care Unit and see someone that you dearly love hooked up to more gadgets and gizmos than you'll find in most Best Buy showrooms.  To see your best buddy lying there in the middle of all those whirring, clacking, buzzing machines with the plastic tubing and bags of dripping fluids and charts and bottles and all manner of medical paraphernalia, looking twenty years older and pale as a ghost against the hospital sheets is difficult - darned difficult - as that's when it really hits you that time is winding down; that Death is coming long before you ever thought possible riding that pale horse found in Revelation 6:7-8; and that there's not a damned thing that you can do about it except accept it and hope that he's not coming at a fast gallop but instead maybe taking a slower trot towards his final destination.  And it hurts.

When I first walked into Cyndi's room at Saint Joseph's Hospital last Tuesday and took in that scene before me, it finally fully dawned on me that there were never going to be any more drives up to Lake Tahoe to park on a spot on high looking over the lake and reveling in the beauty that God had wrought, no more trips to the cemetery that I could see from her hospital window to sit on the grass near Timmy's grave and chat with a fallen friend as we reminisced about days gone by at the Stockton Police Department, no more dinners or lunches at our favorite Mexican restaurant in downtown Stockton where we no doubt ate too much but enjoyed every bite of it, no more impromptu trips to San Francisco or the wine country or the foothills of the Sierra Nevadas, no more late-night phone calls that would last for hours with topics that ranged from the Armed Forces to how many cats did she own now to our families and their trials and tribulations to politics and how she wanted that vote she had wasted on Obama back to the possibility of past lives and how we surely must have known each other then to be such good friends in this life to everything in between, and never would there ever be that long-promised return trip to the East Coast and the chance to visit Gettysburg together - something that we had often talked about.

The reality of the situation is that my friend is being robbed of her life by amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or ALS, a disease of the nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord that control voluntary muscle movements.  Cyndi is now tethered to this life simply by the tubing that runs from the ventilator next to her bed into her throat and provides her the air that keeps her alive; life-sustaining air that the secretions that build up in her throat won't allow her to take in by normal means anymore. She's dying - she knows it and I know it and there was pretty much no getting around that fact as I held her hand and felt the paper thinness of her skin - skin that reminded me of my 92-year old grandmother but which encased the muscles and bones of a beloved friend who is only 58.

Fortunately, Cyndi had regained her ability to speak by the time I was able to get out to see her and she did a pretty good job communicating with me, though at times it was hard to understand her and she quite frequently had to stop in mid-sentence to try to get her throat muscles to work well enough to form the words she wanted to say.  Ever the resourceful one, she had a back-up system should her voice fail - next to her was mounted an iPad2 with a text-to-talk program ready to go if talking became too difficult but luckily we never had to resort to that.  Considering that typing isn't all that easy either with the muscle weakness and contractures in her hands, I was glad we didn't have to go that route.  Besides, it's hard to convey that patented Cyndi sarcasm via typed word!

No stranger to adversity in her life, Cyndi is handling this latest lousy turn of events with the same aplomb that I've seen her use in many a difficult situation and she's not shying away from the cold hard facts of the matter.  We discussed her final wishes (no funeral but a BBQ would be nice, cremation is the way she wants to go with her ashes being spread at some of her designated favorite places) and her biggest worry - which is that her husband of 35 years won't be too lonely and become a hermit or worse when she's gone. We talked about some of our good times and some of our bad times and how our friendship was special in that it had not only stood the test of time and distance but that it had grown stronger over the years rather than faded away like so many friendships do.  We talked about the fact that I'm perfectly happy being single and no, she wasn't going to get her dying wish that I meet someone who loved me as much as I loved him even if she tried to play the "but I'm dying card!"

She told me that she'd had a good long life (I said I failed to see how 58 qualified as being long) and that she had gotten to see and do a lot of things that she had wanted to do in life; she said that it could have been worse, she could have lived during a time when you had to go to the river and pound your clothes with rocks to clean them or where there was no Pepsi (she's been a Pepsi addict for as long as I've known her).  We talked about the people on her list she had all intentions of coming back to haunt or at least giving a cosmic kick to and we talked about the people she'd meet in heaven.

And she told me not to be sad that she was dying.

Well ... that's something that I can't do and I told her as much in between trying not to cry (and in turn making the nurse who had come in at that time to give her a breathing treatment cry also).  I told her that if there was ever a time to be sad about something that this was it and I was going to by-golly be sad whether she liked it or not.  She finally acquiesced and said that okay, I could be sad but just a little and not for long but to be honest, I'm having some trouble with that.

Anyhow, more later as I'm quite violating Cyndi's edict not to be sad right here in this very post where I've pretty much decided that whole 'not being sad thing' is going to take me a long time to master - if I ever do at all.

Tacos and Burgers and Rice - Oh My!

It's rather hard to believe that a full week has passed and that I have flown out to California and back already but it has and I did. I think I'm still trying to process some of my trip but while I'm doing that, I thought I'd share with you some of the food that I had the chance to enjoy while I was on the West Coast that I can't get here on the East Coast ... and that's probably a good thing as I sure don't need to eat like this on a regular basis!

First up was my late dinner on the Monday that I arrived in Stockton.  My flights were running a bit late so I didn't get checked into my hotel until almost 9:00 and at that point all I wanted was something fast to eat (I really miss the days when they'd actually feed you a real meal on a plane!).  Luckily for me, there was a Jack in the Box right down the road from my hotel so I grabbed an Ultimate Cheeseburger and some Seasoned Curly Fries so that I could take a picture and make my cousin Amy jealous while filling that hole in my stomach! Healthy?  Heck no!  Tasty?  Whoa yeah!

Tuesday dawned rainy and blah but that was okay, I know they need the rain out there and it sure wasn't going to stop me from partaking in my first really good Mexican meal in almost three years!  I decided to head to North Stockton and have lunch at Miguel's which is the very first Mexican restaurant I ever ate at in Stockton way back in 1980 when I visited there with my first husband. Cyndi and I used to go there on occasion also when we weren't hitting up our favorite Cancun as it was closer to her home so yes, there were some sentimental reasons for going there - plus the food is delicious!

I suppose that it looks a little bit like a hole-in-the-wall kind of place but don't let that fool you at all! I got there a bit before the lunch crowd as you can see but when I left, it had filled up quite a bit.

Let's see, I had the combination plate with a chicken taco, chicken enchilada, and chile relleno - delicious!  And may I just say - with no offense to Cancun - that Miguel's makes the best salsa in Stockton.

After a rather long day - more of which I'll tell you about later - I didn't get back to my hotel room until after 11:00 at night and with lunch having been about twelve hours earlier, I decided to hit up another burger joint - this time the local In-N-Out Burger.  Just FYI, I didn't eat all of the fries though I probably could have if I had let myself!  It's probably a good thing that neither Jack in the Box nor In-N-Out Burger have East Coast chains or I'd really be in trouble!

Wednesday's lunch I'll tell you about later when I write a post about my trip to Yosemite National Park with Katharine but for now, I'll skip ahead to Thursday after my return to Stockton when I decided that since I was downtown anyway, I may as well stop in at Cancun for lunch. I knew it wasn't going to be the same without Cyndi there with me but tradition dictated that I eat there at least once.

I got there around 2:30 and had the place to myself which seemed to fit how I felt - the dining room was about as empty as my heart. That said, my stomach was pretty empty too so in honor of my friend, I ordered my traditional #12 combinación plate that consists of a beef enchilada and beef quesadilla along with the usual beans and rice.  I opted to add on a chicken taco also as truthfully, I can't get enough of chicken tacos when I'm in California!

Sentimental fool that I am, before I left I asked my waitress if there was a possibility that I could perhaps buy one of their platters to take home with me to go along with the coffee mug that Cyndi had bought for me years ago.  She offered to check with the manager and he graciously agreed to the transaction so I'm now the proud owner of a Cancun dinner platter. What I'll ever do with it I don't know, but I'm pretty sure I'll never look at it and not think of the wonderful meals I shared at my favorite Mexican restaurant with my best buddy over the years. Like I said, I'm a bit of a sentimental fool.

I didn't get back from visiting Cyndi at her new sub-acute care facility in Sacramento until late on Thursday night and at that point I was too tired to even think about eating so there are no pictures of Thursday night's dinner as there was none! I suppose I could have taken a picture of the Super Dog on a Pretzel Roll from Wienershnitzel that Cyndi had requested and I brought to her but I didn't even think of that!

On Friday, I met an old friend and former roommate of mine for lunch at Arroyo's which used to be a restaurant called Luigi Murphy's years ago that he and I used to frequent quite often back when we were attending San Joaquin Delta College together.  A transplanted Long Islander, Scott has been a resident of Stockton for quite some time now and is now the senior sports writer at the Stockton Record. It was great to see him and reminiscence a bit while also catching up on each other's lives.

Being a bit of a stick in the mud it seems when it comes to my menu choices, I had another chicken taco, chicken enchilada, and chile relleno!  Of course, each restaurant makes their food a little bit differently than the other so it wasn't like I was eating the exact same thing over and over again.  That said, even if I had been that would have been okay by me!

Arroyo's sits on the banks of Quail Lakes which is a series of small man-made lakes with a nice housing area developed around them; it's been part of Stockton for as long as I've known Stockton so the view from our table was quite familiar and also one of my last views of Stockton before I pointed my rental car towards Sacramento for a final visit with Cyndi before heading back down to San Francisco to catch my red-eye flight home - something I'm pretty sure I'd never do again!  As far as last views of Stockton go, this one wasn't bad and sharing it with a long-time friend made it even better.

So anyhow, there you have it - lots of Mexican food with the occasional burger thrown in! Eventually I'll get to the serious stuff in regards to my trip but I just wanted to share this part first. Of course, now I've gone and made myself hungry but there's nary a chicken taco to be found!

Five on Friday - The (Nothing-to-Do-With-George-Orwell) 1984 Version

Every time I go back to Stockton I travel into my past and this trip is certainly no exception as my purpose of this journey was to visit my good friend Cyndi whom I firstmet when we were both employed by the City of Stockton as Emergency Telecommunicators at the Police Department.  Cyndi and I met during one of my training sessions in the Comm Center and from that first Friday night on it was like we had known each other for all of our lives.  Matter of fact, most people were surprised to find out that we had just met and hadn't known each other previously!  Some friends are just like that, though and they are truly blessings from above.

As Cyndi and I first met back in 1984, I thought I'd pick five songs from that year for this week's version of Five on Friday which is presented by Travis of Trav's Thoughts and which you could certainly join in on if you had five songs on a Friday that you wanted to share!

Oh, and just as an FYI for those who may not have seen it before, that last video is mine, mine, all mine!  I needed a video to use for "Thriller" and that one brings back happy memories of my time at the Asbury Park Zombie Walk wandering amid the shambling undead!

'Cause I'm Leaving on a Jet Plane ...

As the song goes, "All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go ... " so it's just a matter of tossing my laptop in, loading everything in the car, and heading up to Boston to begin this most bittersweet of journeys to the West Coast.

So ... let's get to it then, shall we?  California here I come.